Friday, January 29, 2010

Learn from other's mistakes....


Winnie: so it's Friday!
Barbie: Thank ya JESUS!
Winnie: LOL...boy pretty excited
Barbie: tough week. But bring on the weekend!
Winnie: I don't have any plans so it not that big of a deal
Barbie: Oh trust me when I say that I have no exciting plans... but I am just looking forward to a change...at least I don't have to make lunches for two days. Ha
Winnie: well. There you go!! lol
Winnie: Guess I will rest up for next weekend. Can't wait!
Barbie: so next Sat. afternoon, we're exploring the big city...hopefully it won't be too cold!
Winnie: let's hope not...or we can sit and have coffee all afternoon lol
Winnie: and people watch, get some good blog material
Barbie: ha, ha....ya...we need some new material.
Winnie: no kidding
Winnie: so......I'm tattoo shopping
Barbie: what???
Winnie: yup, I've decided to do it....
Winnie: been putting it off for 20 years, I think it's about time
Barbie: let me guess....you are going to get "Keep it real" scrolled across your back...ha,ah
Winnie: it was a contender.....
Barbie: please don't say barbed wire around your arm....I will have to have you committed.
Winnie: It's and African symbol that means: Learn from the Past
Barbie: If I were you, I would really research it....make sure it doesn't mean "dumb ass white girl"
Winnie: it's a pretty one too....but who wants to look like Lindsay Lohan?
Barbie: is that what she has??
Barbie: Obviously it isn't working for her.
Winnie: LOL, I don't know, just trying to be funny, help me out here!!!
Barbie: sorry. ha
Barbie: I just don't want you to end up with say...a misspelled tattoo.....I'm not naming names or anything but I know someone who wanted to have Deuce written and now has Duce. oooopsie!! that was definitely worth a spellcheck.
Winnie: ya....that sucks
Winnie: note to self: ask where he got that done...so I don't go there!
Barbie: good plan!
Barbie: Also, I wouldn't recommend a tattoo parlour in the back of anything mobile....but that's just me.
Winnie: shit...guess i should ask for my deposit back eh?
Barbie: Well, you know what happened last time you gave money to Carnies....
Winnie: hey hey hey....that was suppose to be just between you and me!!!!!

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Why???


Winnie: Hello my dear dear friend!
Barbie: Hello!!!!!
Winnie: is there a way of getting out of parenthood?
Barbie: If there was YOU KNOW someone would have found it by now!
Winnie: oh well, guess I need to tough it out lol
Barbie: what a freakin' week!!
Winnie: In feel your pain ;)
Winnie: What's going on today?
Barbie: hmmm....let's see....ex trouble and yesterday I found out a colleague has cancer and today another acquaintance. I just found out five minutes ago that my colleague died late last night.
Winnie: OH no.....so sorry hun
Barbie: don't be sorry for me....I am sorry for their families. It was too late by the time she found out I guess.
Barbie: Plus another friend of mine's father died this week.
Winnie: so horrible
Barbie: Well, we know that death is part of life, but it seems so unfair when someone is taken so young.
Winnie: guess it makes our problems seem so manageable
Barbie: I have a stress neck ache....wonder why? ha, ha
Winnie: one more sleep and you can get help with that !
Barbie: but you are right....these things put it all into perspective. As long as we are living, everything else will be settled.
Barbie: Yes, I am so looking forward to PC's visit. Will be good to have someone to cuddle with.
Winnie: not that it makes our problems less real...but sure does put things into perspective
Barbie: yes. absolutely.
Barbie: and the Haiti earthquake as well. I did my part and gave money to the cause (just so I don't get letters). But it also has served the purpose of showing us how lucky we are here.
Barbie: ....and how humans can pull together for a good cause.
Winnie: Humanity...it has it's strengths
Barbie: yes. It does.
Winnie: So does Friendship ;)
Winnie: it's a small version of humanity
Barbie: Even though I sometimes question it when I look at people like 23 year old Heidi Montag getting 10 plastic surgery procedures!!
Winnie: yes i saw that...poor girl needs some self esteem therapy
Barbie: um...ya think?
Barbie: she ruined her looks entirely
Winnie: although It's more like "how to start over when all you have left that you were born with is the blood flowing through your veins" therapy
Barbie: absolute insanity
Winnie: who's gonna take her seriously now?
Barbie: why can't we just accept ourselves as woman..."flaws" and all?
Winnie: because plastic surgeons would be out of business
Winnie: and some women can...the somewhat sane ones that is
Barbie: If women were smart, we would all band together and just say "this is it" if you don't like it, then no sex for you.
Winnie: then the plastic surgeons could all become marriage counselors lol
Barbie: hahahaha!

Friday, January 15, 2010

Wife Needed...(with no fringe benfits)




Winnie: Good Friday morning!!
Barbie: hi
Barbie: ....looks like it is going to be one of those mornings!!
Winnie: busy girl, what's going on?
Barbie: just to much to do and not enough time
Winnie: imagine if you had to be at work earlier?
Barbie: I know. All these things to do are cramping my style, ha, ha
Winnie: lol
Barbie: you know I was born to be a lady who lunches?
Winnie: guess that should be your next book lol
Barbie: just as soon as I get the 25 million I need to be a proper lady who lunches. ha
Winnie: oh and have to make sure your lady friends are as well equipped
Barbie: but of course my dear!
Barbie: what fun would it is lunching alone?
Winnie: EXACTLY
Winnie: but then again, you do have a small pooch to put in a designer bag and take along with you
Barbie: no, no....my personal assistant will be walking the dog while I lunch.
Winnie: ahhhhhhhhhhh, i see
Winnie: sounds promising
Barbie: well hey; a girl needs to have plan!
Winnie: and first on the list is a personal assistant?
Winnie: oh and don't forget your very own PR lady!!!!
Barbie: or maybe a maid of some kind.
Winnie: mmmmmmmmmm nice
Barbie: I still think I just need a wife.
Winnie: ya, but it's much harder to fire a wife
Barbie: she can cook for me, clean for me, do all the crappy stuff and I can work and come home
and play with the kids
Winnie: but then she wants half when you’re done with her!!! ;)
Winnie: it's cheaper to pay severance pay
Barbie: maybe I'll just hire a maid, nanny and personal assistant instead.
Winnie: sounds like a safer plan to me.....
Barbie: ya
Winnie: and this way you could still have a boyfriend on the side and no one to complain about it
Barbie: Now…THAT’S A PLAN!

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Reasons to stay single in 2010

So, to start out 2010, we have decided to remind
ourselves why we love to be single.
Here are our
top 25 reasons.


When you’re single...


1-Without a spouse you can still have a decent
social life in your 30s.
2-Nobody sees what you look like first thing in the morning.
3-You don’t have to worry about what the bathroom
smells like when you walk out of it.
4-You know where the bar of soap has been.
5-There’s no fight for remote control ownership.
6-You don't have to shave if you don’t want to.
7-You won’t have anyone saying 'you're not going to wear
that, are you? (that’s what friends are for)
8-If there’s dribble on your pillow you know where it came
from.
9-You can be rude if that’s in you’re nature.
10-You can have friends over who behave outrageously
whenever you want.
11-You can surf porn on the Internet till you’re eyes fall out
and don't have to worry about deleting your browser.
12-You can spend all night on the phone without having
to justify it.
13-There's plenty of space in the closet.
14-You can drink wine out of a bottle or milk right out of
the jug whenever you like.
15-You don't have to write cards on anyone’s behalf for
birthdays or Christmas.
16-You can pass gas at will.
17-Your opinion is always the best opinion.
18-You can enjoy great performances of gay musicians
and actors without getting that eye-rolling thingy....
19-Dragon breath in the morning? No big deal.
20-Las Vegas is back on the list of vacation destinations.
21-Sweatpants and baggy shirt? Yes baby!
22-You can tell people you’re single and not have to
lie about it.
23-You can come home drunk and not have to pretend
you’re sober.
24-You can use your own name at hotels.

And last but not least…
 
25-You can actually tell the bartender, "If anyone
calls asking for me, tell them I'm HERE baby!"


Happy New Year to all our fans and thank you for sticking with us in the last couple months. We have slacked…we know, but 2010 is OUR year!!! We’re back with a vengeance!